A couple weeks ago, I got an email with the report for the speech assessment Leon had back in March. It was with the local school district, and because their evaluation and treatments are both free, I felt like they’d be a good unbiased third party to assess him. 

According to the report, he’s in the 1st percentile for articulation and has a “severe speech impairment.” Among other things, their concerns include a frontal lisp and velar fronting. They estimated that he’s understood about 75% of the time by non-family members when context is understood, but he still should be progressing further with the way he uses his tongue.

I felt really validated that I kept asking doctors and teachers about his speech over the last couple years, but also a little sad that I didn’t trust my instincts more and get him in for an evaluation sooner. However, I guess what’s to say that if I brought him in sooner, the speech evaluation would have concluded the same thing, and then I would have had a false sense that everything was OK?

Because the school district wouldn’t be able to get him in for free therapy until August, I immediately called the private speech therapy clinic right next to our house, where many of the school’s speech pathologists work part-time. Leon’s first appointment is two weeks from today, and from then on he’ll have a standing appointment every Monday afternoon. And since the school’s assessment was so thorough (and it’s cheaper for us to go outside of insurance), they have more than enough info to jump right into therapy without an additional evaluation.

On another note, look at these school pictures!

The owner of Leon’s preschool came out to talk to us last Monday when we picked him up. She asked us if we’d considered private kindergarten for this fall. I said not really; since he’s a January birthday we want him to grow up with kids his age, so we planned to start him in 2022.

She said “well, he’s a smart cookie,” and suggested we consider enrolling him in private kindergarten this year so he can stay challenged academically — they didn’t think his next classroom would be advanced enough for him this upcoming year. Then he would essentially repeat kindergarten next year in the public school, and we could find ways to keep him challenged there. She said she has quite a few families do that.

We had missed the deadline for the private kinder evaluation by a couple weeks — but we figured since it was free and they were the ones who offered, it wouldn’t hurt, right? So they assessed him to see if he’s ready from both an academic and emotional standpoint, and on Thursday the owner told us that they recommend that route for him.

My biggest concern was that he’d get bored doing kinder twice, but the owner said the school district can evaluate him for Gifted and Talented in December 2022 to make sure he stays challenged (that said, kindergarten G&T is essentially just meeting the teacher[s], and it wouldn’t even begin for him until March 2023). I also consulted with a friend who used to teach elementary school in the district, and she said she had kids every year who had done kinder twice, and her niece is currently doing private kinder with the plan to start public kinder next year. She also told us that we can request a teacher who is good with challenging her students, but she said she thinks that the environment will be so different that he’ll stay engaged regardless.

Some of the moms I talked to in my online moms group were skeptical and even went so far as to say that they’d enroll their child in another preschool if such a thing was suggested to them because kids this age need to just worry about playing and making friends. While I understand that point, he’s reading at about a first-grade level and knows addition and subtraction, and is ENJOYING learning. If he’s doing well and having fun, I want to maintain that momentum — why stop his progress for some arbitrary reason? I also don’t want them to take away time/resources from other kids to give him 1:1 time when the school is telling me that he’d be doing those exact things in a different classroom. This will still be play-based learning with lots of small-group activities with the teacher — it’s not like he’ll be at a desk reading a textbook all day. Yes, he’s a kid, but he does GREAT with structure and routine, so I’m not worried that kindergarten would cramp his style.

I wish more parenting decisions were black and white, but I hope Future Leon at least understands that even if this wasn’t the best choice in hindsight, we’re doing the best we can with the information we have. Minh is all on board and was ready to sign papers the moment the owner told us they recommended kindergarten; for once I’m the one who is waiting so I can look into every single option. But my research confirmed my gut reaction that (I think?) this is the best choice for him.

I still don’t love the idea of school uniforms though. 💩

The Atlanta massage parlor shootings happened last week, and since then, #StopAsianHate has been trending on social media.

Last night, Leon looked over my shoulder and saw “STOP ASIAN HATE” written in large letters on my phone. He said, “Stop… Asian… hate. What’s ‘Asian hate’?” And my heart just broke.

I escaped into my own mind for a while as I contemplated the proper answer for a four-year-old who not only doesn’t understand the concept of race but especially not the fact that some people commit hate crimes because of race. I lost myself in the innocent brown eyes staring up at me.

By the time I was able to blabber something about how some people are mean to other people because they look different, Leon had lost interest and shifted his focus back to The Magic School Bus. I don’t think he even heard my answer.

Minh asked me the other day how and when we want to approach the subject of race with Leon. I’ve thought about it lately, especially since the racist anti-Asian Dr. Seuss characters made headlines, and honestly, I planned on deferring to Minh about the most appropriate time and way to go about it. I obviously have no idea what it’s like to grow up as a minority.

As Leon has learned about body parts, we’ve set the stage that some people have brown, curly hair (Mommy and Leon), some people have black hair (Daddy), some people have blonde hair (his friend at school), some people have something else — but all hair is pretty. Similarly, our family has light skin, but some people (like a couple of his teachers and friends) have darker skin — but everyone’s skin does the same job. 

Similarly, we’ve done our best to expose him to a variety of cultures, foods, experiences, etc. And he identifies well with the foods from his own Korean heritage (he and Minh ate gimbap yesterday, and the other day he called Halmoni to tell her how much he likes Spam and eggs). I really have no doubt that we can teach him to be respectful, appreciative, and proud. 

But, like I’m assuming most parents feel, it just hurts my heart to introduce the concept that sometimes this world is unfair, and some people do horrible things for no reason other than the fact that they’re hateful. And there’s really not a whole lot I can do about that to shield him from that ignorance. And that sucks.

On a lighter note, we took Leon to the natatorium yesterday, and he really enjoyed his first real swimming experience. He was all smiles.

If you won a million dollars, what would you buy?
“Um, I will have a butterfly.”

How long does it take to get to the beach?
“Five.”

What do I always say to you?
“Love you.”

What do you want to be when you grow up?
“A pumpkin. Spooky pumpkin! A jack-o’-lantern pumpkin.”

Who is the strongest person?
*whispers* “Daddy.”

Where do babies come from?
“The baby room.”

At what age do you become an adult?
“Four!”

What wild animal do you like?
“A tiger.”

What would you do if you couldn’t find your underwear?
“Give up.”

If you could eat one thing for the rest of your life, what would it be?
“Some broccoli.”

How much does it cost to buy a house?
“A toy house: Four.”

Who do you hang out with all the time?
“Mommy and Daddy.” 

What are you scared of?
“Um, not scared of shadows anymore. I’m just scared at the Grover book.”

What is your favorite game to play?
*points into the game room* “Anything I like to play at the dining room table.”

What’s your favorite color?
“Red and blue. Red paint, blue paint.” *dances*

How old am I?
“I think you are four.”

Where do you want to live when you grow up?
“At school or at home.”

What’s the safest place in the world?
“Not the street.”

Who is your favorite old person?
*points at me*

What’s your parents’ favorite thing to do?
“Play with me.”

Who loves you most?
*points at me and giggles*

Minh: *showing Leon that we have more Spam in the pantry* Do you want eggs and Spam?!”
Leon: “YES! Daddy, [new friend at school] doesn’t know Spam.”
Me: “… Do you talk about Spam at school?”
Leon: “Yes.”
Me: “Yeah, I don’t know if any of your friends would really know about Spam, bud.”

Leon has officially been potty-trained for two years now, so we don’t pay too much attention when he goes to the bathroom unless he asks for help. But tonight during our bedtime routine, I watched him dribble on the seat, get up, pull some toilet paper to wipe up the dribbles… then carefully roll the toilet paper back onto the roll and walk away. 🤦🏻‍♀️

Despite taking all possible precautions, I got COVID-19 several weeks ago. Thankfully Leon never tested positive and we’ve all completed our quarantines, but I was pretty sick for a while and had to spend a lot of time resting and sleeping. At one point I got out of breath from talking or sitting up too long.

Anyway, fast forward to today. Leon moved up to the Junior Kinder 1 classroom on Monday (his first day post-quarantine, and also his 4th birthday!), and I got a picture from his new teacher saying that, when asked what he wanted to be when he grew up, Leon said a doctor.

To make conversation at dinner tonight, Minh asked him why he said he wanted to be a doctor.

He said, “So I can take care of Mommy.”

Leon told me he listened to a song today called The Leaves Falling Down.

When I watched the video of his class dancing to it I realized the song he was referring to: Feliz Navidad. 😂

Leon, as soon as he got home today: “Mommy and Daddy, I said **** in the gym today because the green ball got STUCK!”

😳😳😳

Minh: “Aw, sh*t.”
Leon: “Daddy, you can’t say sh*t.”
Minh: “You can’t say it either. Only grown-ups.”
Leon: “But I’m going to be a grown-up…”